Looking at your issues thinking you don't have one will get you stuck. For example thinking I don't have a choice to be happy b/c my marriage is falling apart, my weight won't come off, I have to be stressed because of bills... these thoughts are all choices we make that keep us stuck in a pattern of negative behavior instead of taking the second option. In order to get what we want in life we have to let go of what we don't want. Hanging on to stress keeps us from obtaining our goals. If you hang on to the stress of not having enough money, then you are keeping yourself from getting enough money. If you are stressed because you are overweight, sitting in front of the TV with a carton of ice cream or eating that extra piece of pizza isn't going to make that stress go away. This is where many addictions start!
When you let go of that stress and worry you start to love yourself. Making the choice to let go, lets love in. When you let go of who you think you are supposed to be or where you are supposed to be at in your life, you can no longer blame yourself for not reaching an expectation. Releasing expectations that you haven't met in life helps you to surrender, let go of control, and open yourself up to a more happy life. Instead of trying to control how you reach your goals you are open and your goals come to you.
We have to realize that control is formed from fear. When you consider letting go of the control its scary, the first thing that enters your mind is a fear statement. If I let go of control will everything fall apart? It very well may, but sometimes things have to fall apart so we have the opportunity to learn to be at peace when putting it back together. We can't stay yoked to what we think will happen b/c we don't know. If you put the good intention out there you will get it back. Why don't you just throw away the stress outcome and live your best life?! If you hold on and micro manage everything in your life you will live crisis to crisis and stand in the way of yourself. You will always keep yourself from true happiness.
When you stand in your way and look to those outcomes its like looking to others to be your best self and depending on their approval to make you feel whole. It doesn't work like that. Don't look to someone else to make you want to better yourself, look to yourself. Because when that relationship starts to fail you put too much energy into what they think of you and you lost Who You Are. Many people have made me want to be a better version of me by challenging me to rise to an occasion. But all along that was false and made me stand in my own way by teaching me to people please, and not teaching me how to depend on myself to be the best version of me.
Look your insecurities, your failures and your expectations that did not pan out in the eyes and tell them you are enough let it know that it's not going to best you because you are going to be the best version of you everyday. You are making a choice to focus on how you want to feel instead of controlling how you feel. Once you start to focus on how you want to feel you begin to let go of the things that keep you from feeling that way. I want to feel comfortable in my skin, I want to feel like I don't have to count every last calorie, I want to feel like I don't have to compare my body to others, I want to feel happy. So I will show up for myself and showing up for yourself everyday becomes a lifestyle not something you try and fail at.It's a simple choice. You read that right ... simple. You don't start tomorrow or in a week you simply say, "self... you deserve to feel happy and to be enough. I am making the choice to put my past behind me and let go.I will let go and let love in, let my hopes and dreams in and that will keep the fear and stress out. I chose to lovemyself so I will know how to better love those around me because I choose to be whole. Not stuck in a hole.
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